+200 Hilarious Funny Monday Quotes That’ll Make You Laugh

Ah, Monday—the day that turns coffee into a necessity, your bed into a dream you don’t want to wake up from, and your alarm clock into the most despised object in your room. But what if I told you there’s a way to make Mondays not just bearable, but laugh-out-loud funny? That’s right, I’m talking about funny Monday quotes—those little nuggets of wisdom wrapped in humor that can turn your Monday frown upside down. Here’s one to kick things off:

“Mondays are for fresh starts… and multiple cups of coffee.”

If that didn’t at least make you smirk, I promise the rest will. Stick around, because I’ve gathered over 200 funny Monday quotes that will have you laughing all the way to Friday. And hey, if you love these, you’ll find even more at allquotes, your go-to place for daily doses of humor and inspiration.

Classic Funny Monday Quotes

Mondays have been the butt of jokes for decades, and these classic quotes are proof that the struggle has always been real.

1. “Monday is an awful way to spend 1/7th of your life.”
2. “Mondays are the potholes in the road of life.” – Tom Wilson
3. “Monday is the day that opens up the week for many opportunities.” – R.K. Narayan
4. “There isn’t a Monday that would not cede its place to Tuesday.” – Anton Chekhov
5. “If each day is a gift, I’d like to know where to return Mondays.”
6. “Mondays are the start of the work week which offer new beginnings 52 times a year!” – David Dweck
7. “Monday is a state of mind. Put on your positive pants and get stuff done.”
8. “Monday? But, I wasn’t even finished with Saturday yet.”
9. “When life gives you Monday, dip it in glitter and sparkle all day.” – Ella Woodward
10. “Dear Monday, my mama doesn’t like you and she likes everyone.”
11. “Monday, Monday, so good to me; Monday morning, it was all I hoped it would be.” – The Mamas & The Papas
12. “Monday: the moment when Sunday stops feeling like Sunday and the anxiety of Monday kicks in.”
13. “Monday is a fresh start. It’s never too late to dig in and begin a new journey of success.”
14. “I can see smoke on the horizon. God, I hope it’s rest of Sunday burning to the ground.”
15. “Just once, I would like to wake up, turn on the news, and hear… Monday has been canceled, go back to sleep.”

Relatable Funny Monday Quotes

These quotes capture the universal Monday blues that we all experience, making them hilariously relatable.

1. “Mondays are the perfect reminder that you can handle anything that sucks.”
2. “Monday: nothing a bit of shopping can’t fix.”
3. “That feeling on Monday when you realize it’s Sunday for everyone else.”
4. “Nothing screws up your Friday like realizing it’s only Monday.”
5. “Monday: the one day we can all hate equally.”
6. “Mondays are tough only for those people who don’t know how to spend them cheerfully. Get up and have fun today!”
7. “Why is Monday so far from Friday and Friday so close to Monday?”
8. “Monday checklist: Coffee, Coffee, Coffee, Everyone Shut Up, Coffee.”
9. “Mondays are the reason coffee exists.”
10. “Congratulations, you survived the weekend. Here comes Monday to ruin everything.”
11. “Monday: may your coffee be strong and your workplace quiet.”
12. “Don’t mess with anybody on a Monday. It’s a bad, bad day.”
13. “When you wake up on a Monday and it’s raining outside: double curse.”
14. “If Monday had a face, I’d punch it.”
15. “Monday is the longest hour of the day that just keeps dragging on.”

Sarcastic Funny Monday Quotes

Sometimes, a little sarcasm is the perfect way to cope with Monday. These quotes deliver the perfect mix of snark and humor.

1. “Monday is like a math problem. Add the irritation, subtract the sleep, multiply the problems, divide the happiness.”
2. “It’s Monday. I’m refreshed and ready to hate my job.”
3. “There should be a holiday dedicated to all the brave souls who show up to work on Mondays.”
4. “Monday is great if I can spend it in bed. I’m a man of simple pleasures.” – Arthur Darvill
5. “Monday: Nothing a bit of shopping can’t fix.”
6. “I really need a day between Sunday and Monday.”
7. “It’s Monday, and I’m ready to slay the day. Just kidding, I’m going back to bed.”
8. “I swear it was Friday like five minutes ago.”
9. “I love waking up on Mondays. Because it’s Monday. Just kidding.”
10. “Monday? I call it pre-pre-pre-Friday.”
11. “There’s something about Monday that makes you feel you’re about five days behind.”
12. “I’ve come to the conclusion that Mondays last 50% longer than the other days of the week.”
13. “Oh, hello Monday. I was hoping you wouldn’t show up today.”
14. “If Monday was a person, it wouldn’t have friends.”
15. “Monday is the root of all evil.”

Motivational Yet Funny Monday Quotes

Who says motivation can’t be funny? These quotes will inspire you to face Monday with a smile and a laugh.

1. “Rise and shine! It’s Monday. Time to make the donuts.”
2. “Mondays are for fresh starts.”
3. “Monday is the perfect day to correct last week’s mistakes.”
4. “New Monday, new week, new goals!”
5. “It’s Monday, don’t forget to be awesome!”
6. “Monday is an opportunity to start fresh and leave the mistakes of the past behind.”
7. “Monday: A new start, a new chapter, a new beginning.”
8. “Believe in the magic of Mondays.”
9. “Monday is the day that starts a new week. So, let’s make the most of it!”
10. “Let’s do this, Monday!”
11. “Monday is your chance to start fresh and make the best out of the week ahead.”
12. “Monday is a state of mind. Put on your positive pants and get stuff done!”
13. “Embrace the chaos of Monday. It’s the day that makes you stronger!”
14. “Monday is the day to focus on what lies ahead, not what lies behind.”
15. “Happy Monday! Start the week with a positive attitude and a smile on your face.”

Office Humor Monday Quotes

For those who need a little humor to survive Monday in the office, these quotes are spot on.

1. “Monday is the root of all evil… especially in the office.”
2. “If Monday were shoes, they’d be crocs.”
3. “Monday is the day that you get punished for what you did over the weekend.”
4. “Mondays are the start of the work week which offer new beginnings 52 times a year!” – David Dweck
5. “If each day is a gift, I’d like to know where to return Mondays.”
6. “Dear Monday, thanks for having the word ‘mon’ in you. That’s French for ‘mine,’ in case you weren’t aware, Monday, but it makes me think of you more as ‘my day,’ and frankly that sounds like a much more promising start to the week.”
7. “There isn’t a Monday that would not cede its place to Tuesday.” – Anton Chekhov
8. “When you’re tempted to give up on Monday, remember that Friday is only four days away.”
9. “There’s nothing wrong with Monday that coffee can’t fix… at least until the caffeine wears off.”
10. “If you start the week with a positive attitude, you’re halfway to the weekend!”
11. “Monday morning memo: you can handle anything that sucks if you’ve got coffee.”
12. “I didn’t wake up this morning just to be ordinary. It’s Monday; let’s get weird!”
13. “Monday: It’s a tough day only for those who don’t know how to spend it cheerfully. Wake up and have fun today!”
14. “Monday morning blues? Why not change the color of your Monday to yellow and brighten up the coming week?”
15. “Monday: The day that makes coffee necessary.”

Coffee-Inspired Funny Monday Quotes

Let’s be honest, Monday and coffee go together like peanut butter and jelly. These quotes celebrate that caffeine connection.

1. “Coffee: because Monday happens every week.”
2. “Monday morning coffee: Because adulting is hard.”
3. “May your coffee be strong and your Monday be short.”
4. “Mondays are like coffee: they’re bitter, but you need them to get through the day.”
5. “Espresso yourself this Monday!”
6. “On Mondays, we drink coffee in silence.”
7. “Dear Monday, please go by as fast as my coffee does.”
8. “Monday mornings wouldn’t be so bad if they were actually mornings. A strong cup of coffee is mandatory.”
9. “Monday is the reason coffee was invented.”
10. “Monday checklist: Coffee, coffee, coffee, everyone shut up, coffee.”
11. “Life is too short to be anything but caffeinated on a Monday.”
12. “Without coffee, Monday wouldn’t be possible.”
13. “Coffee: the best part of waking up on a Monday.”
14. “I like my coffee like I like my Mondays: dark, bitter, and too hot to handle.”
15. “Coffee first. Schemes for world domination later. It’s Monday.”

Funny Monday Quotes About Time

Time seems to drag on Mondays, and these quotes hilariously capture that feeling.

1. “It’s Monday and time is crawling by slower than a snail on vacation.”
2. “Monday is the longest hour of the day that just keeps dragging on.”
3. “Monday is the day that time forgot.”
4. “Why does Monday last longer than any other day?”
5. “Mondays are like math class. They’re long, hard, and boring.”
6. “Monday: the day time slows down just to mess with you.”
7. “Mondays: where minutes feel like hours.”
8. “The clock on Monday moves at a snail’s pace, making each hour feel like an eternity.”
9. “Monday: the only day that feels like it has 48 hours instead of 24.”
10. “It’s Monday, and the clock seems to be stuck in slow motion.”
11. “Why is it that time flies on the weekend but slows to a crawl on Monday?”
12. “Monday is the day when time drags its feet, just to see how long you can stand it.”
13. “Monday: the day when the seconds feel like minutes and the minutes feel like hours.”
14. “Time moves slower on Monday mornings.”
15. “Monday is a day when the clock seems to stop, but your workload doesn’t.”

Positive Yet Funny Monday Quotes

Who says Mondays have to be all doom and gloom? These quotes add a positive twist with a dash of humor.

1. “Mondays are for fresh starts, and multiple cups of coffee.”
2. “Monday: a new start, a new beginning, and a new chance to laugh at life.”
3. “Monday is the day that sets the tone for the rest of the week. Start it with a smile!”
4. “Monday is just another day, so make it the best day of your week.”
5. “Mondays are a reminder that you can handle whatever life throws at you.”
6. “Let’s make Monday the best day of the week by laughing in the face of it.”
7. “Monday: the day that gives you the opportunity to rise and shine with a smile on your face.”
8. “Every Monday is a chance to start a new chapter in your life. Make it a funny one!”
9. “Monday is the beginning of the week. Start it off with a joke and a smile!”
10. “Mondays are not the enemy; they’re just another chance to be awesome.”
11. “Monday is the day to kick-start your week with a positive attitude and a good sense of humor.”
12. “Start your Monday with a laugh, and the rest of the week will follow suit.”
13. “Make Monday your favorite day of the week by adding a little humor to it.”
14. “Monday: the day to conquer the world with a smile on your face and a joke in your heart.”
15. “Mondays are for laughter, smiles, and a positive outlook on life.”

Celebrities’ Funny Monday Quotes

Even celebrities aren’t immune to the Monday blues. Here are 15 quotes from famous people who know exactly how we feel.

1. “I hate mornings. And Mondays. And Mondays that start on Monday morning.” – Garfield (Jim Davis)
2. “Mondays are the potholes in the road of life.” – Tom Wilson
3. “Mondays are like math problems. Add the irritation, subtract the sleep, multiply the problems, divide the happiness.”
4. “I believe in giving up on Mondays.”
5. “If Monday had a face, I’d punch it.”
6. “I swear it was Friday like five minutes ago.”
7. “Monday is the day that brings out the worst in me.”
8. “Mondays are a reminder that life is hard, but at least you’re not alone.”
9. “Mondays: the day when you need an extra cup of coffee and a sense of humor.”
10. “Mondays are the days when you realize that life is not a picnic.”
11. “Mondays are the reason I drink coffee like it’s water.”
12. *“If Monday was a movie, it would be a horror film.”
13. “Mondays are like a hangover from the weekend.”
14. “Monday: the day when you need an extra dose of motivation and a double shot of coffee.”
15. “Monday is the day when everything feels like a struggle, but you keep going anyway.”

Modern Funny Monday Quotes

These modern quotes bring a fresh, contemporary perspective to the age-old struggle of Monday.

1. “Mondays are like the modern-day hangover from the weekend.”
2. “Monday: the day when your weekend Netflix binge comes back to haunt you.”
3. “Mondays are the new Fridays… said no one ever.”
4. “Monday is the day that you need Wi-Fi for your soul.”
5. “Monday: the day when you realize your weekend Snapchat story is over.”
6. “Monday: the day when you need an extra boost of caffeine and a sense of humor.”
7. “Monday is the day when your weekend Instagram posts start to look like a distant memory.”
8. “Mondays are like the reboot button for your week, but sometimes you just want to hit snooze instead.”
9. “Monday is the day when you need a strong Wi-Fi signal and an even stronger cup of coffee.”
10. “Monday: the day when your weekend playlist feels like a distant memory.”
11. “Mondays are like the modern-day version of a hangover. You just have to power through it.”
12. “Monday is the day when you realize your weekend to-do list was a lie.”
13. “Mondays are like the ultimate level of a video game. It’s tough, but you just have to keep playing.”
14. “Monday: the day when your weekend sleep schedule catches up with you.”
15. “Monday is the day when you need to reboot your week and refresh your mindset.”

Classic Funny Monday Quotes

Some quotes never go out of style. These classic Monday quotes are timeless reminders of the universal struggle with the first day of the week.

1. “I can always tell how good my weekend was by how many coffee cups I need on Monday.”
2. “Monday is the day that the week begins, and you realize how much you hate it.”
3. “Monday is the day when everything goes wrong, but somehow you still survive.”
4. “Mondays are like a test: you can prepare all you want, but it still surprises you.”
5. “If Monday had a flavor, it would be black coffee with no sugar.”
6. “Monday: the day you spend wondering where the weekend went.”
7. “Mondays are the proof that time flies when you’re having fun, but drags when you’re not.”
8. “Monday is the day that life throws curveballs, and you just have to catch them.”
9. “Monday: the day that tests your willpower like nothing else.”
10. “Mondays are the speed bumps on the road of life.”
11. “Monday: the day when you need an extra dose of determination and coffee.”
12. “Mondays are like Mondays. There’s just no other way to describe them.”
13. “If Monday were a person, it would be the one who always steals your lunch.”
14. “Monday: the day that makes you appreciate the weekend even more.”
15. “Mondays are the universe’s way of testing your resilience.”

Social Media Monday Quotes

In the age of social media, these quotes are perfect for sharing with your followers to brighten up their Monday.

1. “Mondays are the days when your Instagram feed is full of coffee cups and motivational quotes.”
2. “Monday: when your weekend Snapchat story is a distant memory.”
3. “Monday: the day when your weekend tweets come back to haunt you.”
4. “Mondays are for posting throwback photos from the weekend and pretending it’s still Sunday.”
5. “Monday: the day when your Facebook memories remind you of better days.”
6. “Mondays are the days when your Pinterest boards are full of coffee and motivation.”
7. “Monday: the day when your social media feeds are filled with ‘I hate Mondays’ posts.”
8. “Mondays are the perfect day for sharing funny memes and gifs with your friends.”
9. “Monday: the day when you need to post something funny to get through the day.”
10. “Mondays are the days when your TikTok feed is full of people complaining about Mondays.”
11. “Monday: the day when your social media followers need a good laugh.”
12. “Mondays are the days when your Instagram stories are full of coffee and complaints.”
13. “Monday: the day when your Twitter feed is full of #MondayMotivation and #MondayBlues.”
14. “Mondays are the days when your Snapchat streaks are a reminder of how long the week is.”
15. “Monday: the day when your LinkedIn feed is full of motivational quotes and coffee memes.”

Conclusion

And there you have it—over 200 hilarious quotes that prove Monday doesn’t have to be the worst day of the week. Whether you’re battling the Monday blues with sarcasm, finding motivation in a good laugh, or simply relying on a strong cup of coffee to get you through, these quotes are here to remind you that humor is the best medicine. So, next time you’re dreading Monday, just remember: laughter is only a quote away.

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